Informed sources: A 21st Century Paul Revere was spotted in Western Pennsylvania screaming on his horse, “The Brownies are coming! The Brownies are coming!” Gov. Wolf needs to alert the militias!
... my note to Gov. Tom Wolf
Dear Gov. Wolf, You are no doubt aware of the first part of the Second Amendment to the U.S. Constitution: "A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State …”
Well, it appears that the nefarious Cleveland Browns are in Pittsburgh for another football game against our beloved Steelers. However, while they have not won in the ‘’Burgh since 2003, the last game — in Cleveland — was a debacle, with a player taking a swing at our QB with his helmet.
That player is gone, but the others who knocked out our beloved JuJu Smith-Schuster and our promising rookie Diontae Johnson are still there.
In the interest of safety, you need to alert the state militias, the guard and reserves, to be ready for this violence.
Please get them to Heinz Field ASAP.
Rumor is that some fans with Cleveland Browns regalia are already in the stadium, so time is of the essence.
Sincerely,
Hugh Conrad
A quiet and reserved Steelers fan
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